Because they are improper, sexist, and harmful, saying these things will make you sound insecure, entitled, and controlling. Many of these things might even get you fired. Additionally, some of these statements feed into negative gendered stereotypes.>>>CONTINUE FULL READING HERE
They hurt the ability of every person to define who they are, regardless of gender.
1. “Are you pregnant?”
We could talk about the social, personal, or medical realities of childbirth. Women make complicated and introspective assessments of whether and when to reveal that they are pregnant. But, we don’t have to because whether a woman is pregnant or not is none of your business.
Kyle demonstrating what you should never say to a woman. He is asking is someone is pregnant.
Asking someone if they’re pregnant is especially when they’re not is not only awkward but offensive as well.
Therefore, you have no reason to ask about it. If she wants to share, she’ll bring it up.
2. “When are you going to have children?”
We could just refer to the above point, but we’ll emphasize that this loaded question supports the sexist assumption that all women do or should want to have children. Sexist conventions have often propped up to the impression that a woman exists to only have children.
Having a child of your own is truly amazing, but you should never ask a woman when she plans on having one. (Tie from Fort Belvedere)
When presuming to ask when a woman is going to have children, you’re playing right into this assumption. Once again, if a woman wants to share her reproductive plans with you, she will do so when she chooses.
3. “Is it that time of the month?”
Ovulation, menopause, and other hormonal cycles affect women differently. It’s insulting, juvenile, and ignorant to assume that any time a woman is having a bad day or is having strong emotions that it’s because of hormones. News flash: men also have hormones and they’re not that great at controlling them.
Would you want people to dismiss your feelings based on groundless beliefs about hormones? Saying things like, “He’s a teen. He does all his thinking in his pants,” or “He’s middle-aged. This is all just a mid-life crisis.”
Kyle pointing to his watch with a speech buble that asks if it’s that time of the month.
Asking women if it’s that time of the month implies that their current mood is due to hormones.
Hormones affect everyone differently, but that doesn’t justify treating someone differently or making assumptions about their involvement in someone’s feelings.
4. “You look tired/sick.”
Frankly, you would never want to say to anyone “You look terrible today. Do you have the flu? The plague?” No one likes hearing that they don’t look their best. Chances are they’re perfectly aware of how they look. Unlike in the 15th century, people can afford mirrors.
Raphael having a conversation with Teresa while standing in line.
Telling someone they look sick and tired is like telling them that they look terrible.
Questions like these are especially galling for women. This is because society holds women to a much higher standard than men when it comes to personal public appearance. If you’re genuinely concerned about how someone is feeling, don’t express it by critiquing someone’s appearance.
5. “Are you sure you want to wear that?”
As men who like to dress well, you’ve probably received some unsolicited negative comments about your wardrobe choices. And was this helpful to you? We suspect not. So, don’t presume to tell others what they should or should not wear.
Kyle with a speech bubble that asks “are you sure you want to wear that”
Asking this question isn’t really helpful. Try suggesting what might complement their outfit instead.
This question is more insulting when said by a man to a woman because it implies that a man is a much better judge of what a woman should be able to wear. If someone asks you your opinion on their look or is actively seeking advice, share it honestly and kindly.
6. “You shouldn’t wear so much makeup.”
Maybe you think by saying this you’re indicating that a woman is naturally beautiful. But, notice that what you’re actually saying is, “I know what’s better for you than you do.” How much or how little makeup a woman wears is her choice. Unless a woman specifically asks for your input, it isn’t your place to give it.
7. “Are you sure you want to eat that?”
Unless you are a medical professional providing dietary advice or a parent and selling the love of green vegetables, you have no place to tell anyone what to eat.
People are free to make their own choices about what to eat!
This is especially true when it comes to women as women are habitually subjected to unfair and unrealistic expectations regarding their eating habits. Not only does saying this implies that a man should control what a woman eats, but it also implies that the woman should conform to society’s unrealistic expectations. Focus your energies on your own good diet and trust that others will do the same.>>>CONTINUE FULL READING HERE
